How to get over Fear and crush it
No matter what people’s positions, titles or status are – learning how to get over fear and overcome them remain an ongoing theme for all.
Today, I’m not speaking of the fear of heights or spiders (personally I turn into a blubbering wreck if a large spider hangs around me for more than 5 minutes!).
I’m talking about how to get over fear that stop us from growing and evolving into the best versions of ourselves and how we want to live our life.
Fear places a huge drain on our time and energy. The days and nights spent second guessing yourself, looking for alternative plans or wondering if it is right becomes exhausting and soul numbing.
So how can we get over our fears and knock them back?
Learn your trigger points
Fear strikes when we step outside of our comfort zone. Each person has their own comfort zone and what is scary for one is a breeze for another.
Skip comparing yourself to someone else thinking ‘if she did it then I should be able to’. Recognise how far outside of your comfort zone you are stepping – are you uncomfortable or terrified?
With that in mind, look more closely at the fear.
Examine the fear
What is underlying your fear reaction?
Someone laughing at you? Rejection? Failure? Feeling stupid?
Understand that whatever feelings arise – they come from your Lizard brain. The moment you try do something that is outside of your comfort zone – he will be freaking out.
It makes a huge difference when we recognise that for what it is, acknowledge it, park it and then continue the road you want to go on.
What is the price of your fear?
In short – an unfulfilled life.
Look at the picture above. Barbed wire is a familiar scene to fence off fields or indicate boundary lines. Too look fierce; it has a few snaggy bits. Yet one pinch from a pair of good wirecutters will render it useless.
Fear is the same. It is a mindset. It’s the self-imposed prison walls we place on our view of what and how our lives unfold. Each time you choose to face and walk through your fear – you gain strength, confidence and courage.
By doing what you think you cannot do – you realise how much more you are capable of.
The easiest way to stop fear is to back off, give up the idea. All this does is ease the anxiety levels and adrenalin that were pumping through your veins.
Has it changed the situation?
Have you benefited on a personal level by not dealing with and walking through the fear?
Tips to help you get over Fear
Firstly, please do practice kindness to yourself. Stepping out of your comfort zone and walking towards uncomfortable and then terrified takes courage and tenacity.
Try one of or use a combination of these tips to help you keep walking:
- Journal your fear. Write it all down. Every last bit that is freaking you out. Now highlight the common themes and ask yourself if it happened today, what would the worst that could happen? and then ‘is this really true?’
- Remember your previous successes. When did you last face a fear headon? And what was the successful outcome? Use that as courage fuel to help you face this one.
- Don’t be so serious. Life is meant to be lived, celebrated and explored in all its different facets. It’s not a long drudging road to be endured with a few breaks (holidays / treats / weekends) along the way. Open your arms to experiencing new terrains in your mind and life.
- Guide others. What would you say to someone who was asking you for advice in this area? Would you be as hard on them as what you are on yourself to shift into a new area? By helping others, we can see what is possible for ourselves
- Approach it in bite sized chunks. There is a (terrible!) saying ‘how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.’ Do the same with fear. Break it down, start with one action and then take another.
Before you know it, you are making progress.
The only rule – don’t stop.
I’d love it if you shared in the comments what your fear-busting tactics are.